Don’t live in someone’s shadow.
Growing up in my neighbourhood, quite often we keep up an appearance to show we’ve got it together, even when you know you don’t. It was important. You lie and put up stories to belong. I remember several times when I didn’t have a story to tell; I’ll make up one to keep up with the trend. So you end up faking your way through because you don’t want to be left out.
You later grow up into adulthood feeling it’s okay to live life that way. Then we face a challenge and unknowingly slide back into the status quo of keeping up appearance again, even though we feel drained, damaged and empty on the inside. We pull ourselves up, put up a mask (not physical mask) but putting up an outward show of what we are not, and then go out to blend with people proving to be okay.
However, when you get back home, behind your closet, you face the real you that you don’t want to admit. I’ve played this game for so long, keeping up appearance with so many things, until two and a half years ago when I got tired of that trend. Trying to be who I was not just to keep up with the evolving society, and pretending to have it all together, when things were falling apart in my life. It is a hard job to keep, and I was tired of playing that role.
The bitter truth is, no one gave me that responsibility. I took it over and felt that’s what I was supposed to do. Now, let me tell you the truth of what I didn’t want to admit, it was the fear of man and the desire to please people that got me to that point since my childhood days. It hurts living in the shadow of other people and trying to be someone else. You only get a short-term outward reward of it, but then internally, your soul is caged and crying out to be free.
Can I encourage you to BE YOU?
If being ‘You’ is going to upset or offend people so be it, but don’t try to be what you’re not because that’s so much burden to carry. Let’s stop pretending to be who we’re not and take off all that mask.
Give yourself a break, and enjoy your uniqueness. There is no other person like you. You are exceptional, precious, outstanding, beautiful and fearfully crafted. Living someone else’s life is a hard task to take on yourself. Open up to the real ‘You’ and allow yourself to grow, because when you’re trying to keep up appearance and be who you’re not, you’re robbing yourself of so many things. Don’t deprive yourself of healthy growing life, sanity, relaxation and freedom.
You are remarkable, peculiar, and a rare gift to planet Earth to distinctively stand out and impact your family, neighbourhood, community, society, your nation and the world at large with your uniqueness. So step out of that shadow and live life fully and abundantly.
Comments are welcome.